…to announce that, after more than a week of sifting through the PCP’s poop, Honey did the honors of finally pronouncing “Houston, we have a MIGHTY BEAN”!
(If you have no earthly idea what I’m talking about, read this first.)
If y’all could have seen the four of us huddled around the potty holding our noses and grinning from ear to ear over a poop covered toy you probably would have had us committed. For days on end I’ve dreaded each day’s bowel movement, hoping and praying that Honey would be around to save me from simultaneously gagging and doing the “Burnette Tuck” (a little trick we picked up from Honey’s college bestie RBB where you pull your shirt up over your nose in stinky situations) while searching for the darned thing.
And while I shudder to think at how much this err in judgement is going to cost me between the emergency room visit and the urgent care visit for follow up x-rays, the PCP has been receiving all sorts of accolades from his friends. You have no idea how many “NO WAY, you’re going to poop out a Mighty Bean” and “that’s AWESOME!” exclamations I’ve heard in the last week.
Oh, and should any of you find yourself in this unenviable position of having to search through your child’s poop after they swallowed a toy/coin/paperclip/what-have-ya, I had my method down to a science (after a few abominable attempts.)
1. Before you leave the hospital/urgent care, ask for a potty seat… the thing that is used for collecting urine and other gross specimens. I’m sure this will cost us, but it was worth every penny.
2. Line the entire seat in LOADS of press and seal. Get it down in the bowl of the seat too.
3. Carry the seat with you in a large zip top bag. Everywhere you go. Like a crazy person. You never know when the moment might strike. And the last thing in the world you want to be doing is mashing through poop in the bowl of a Wal Mart toilet.
4. After the deed has been done, carefully lift up the press and seal and lightly seal it up. Drop it into your zip top bag. Close the bag. Mush it all around in search of the “foreign body” (as they called it in the ER).
I never, in all my days, EVER dreamed I’d be moved to write about such a foul subject for all the world to read. Of course, I never, EVER EVER dreamed I’d have a son who’d think swallowing a toy would be cool. And I certainly never, EVER EVER EVER dreamed I’d have a husband that would save the (cleaned and sanitized) toy for the baby box. :-)
This vacation just got a LOT more relaxing (and a LOT less stinky)!
xoxo
You are so funny, Amanda! I know it wasn't a funny situation, but at least you had a great sense of humor about it. I'd for sure be making certain that Baby doesn't get the idea that swallowing something like his big bro did, is going to garner him a whole bunch of attention & accolades — "little brother see, little brother do!"
CAS
I feel your pain. Our youngest when little swallowed her sister's diary keys! We were less than 12 hours away from gastro surgery when they finally reappeared! So not fun!
You have me cracking up over here! The fact that you can turn poop picking into a blog how-to lesson is classic! Glad to hear that chore is over! Enjoy your vacation!
-Shelley
Echoing Shelley – but it was good info. Thankfully, i think i am past that stage LOL. Go, drink another frozen concoction and seriously relax now. And put away the press and seal.
That is seriously hilarious and seriously gross Amanda!! Oh the things we do as parents. :-) We've had to dig toys out of noses but your experience was way worse by a long shot! Glad the situation has "passed" now… ;-)
Vanessa
So glad that you updated us. This morning I was folding laundry and wondered if he ever pased the bean! Thanks for the tips…you never know when you might need them. Enjoy your trip!
My oldest will soon be 21 and he swallowed a quarter when he was around 2. I immediately called his doctor and her words were, "What goes in must come out." We went through the same thing you did for more than a week until the "foreign body" was expelled. And yes, the cleaned and sanitized (albeit dark) quarter is now proudly taped into his baby book. He will be getting married next year. I think this is a story his fiance' needs to read.
yep…been through this as well!! Only with a penny
My poor dad was babysitting when it "reappeared"
The ER told us it would come out like a brand new
penny So Shiny!! Boy, did it ever shine!
Thanks for the tip, although I REALLY hope I never need it!
Hurray for you! Anyone who has kids has "been there, done that!"
Oh lordy!! I have two small boys and that is SO one of my worst nightmares about them doing the exact same thing!! Ugh!
Great job handling it! ;-)
Love reading all of your stories!!! Thanks for sharing :-)
Looks like you and your family are having a wonderful time. Thanks for visiting. I am going to the back in the day bakery tomorrow. Do you have her cookbook? I am making the blueberry galette from her book and will put on my blog.
Enjoy your vacation!
Laughing so hard at your description! Glad it finally made its reappearance!
Your method of searching for the bean was quite ingenious. I'm going to share it with my husband, a gastroenterologist. I'm sure he has some patients he could share this with. You would be amazed at how many people feel the need to bring him examples of their problems.