Just Mortified

So… I joined a gym over a year ago for the first time in my life.  My visits are too few and far between, but that’s beside the point of this post.  The point of this post is that I actually went a few weeks ago.  I was strangely excited about the treadmill workout I found on the internet and on a complete whim I decided to watch Orange is the New Black while I walked.  I had heard a few mentions of it recently and thought “how curious that orange is taking over black as the go with everything, basic color.”  Go ahead, laugh.  I mean, it’s really quite hysterical in retrospect.  (It is worth mentioning that I had not seen the below image at that time.)

So, there I am, walking along on the treadmill, feeling super good about  being there, as I get Netflix geared up on the first episode.  I’m pretty perplexed by the opening scene but I press forward.  Twenty minutes later, I’ve completely forgotten about what I *thought* this show was all about.  I’m walking.  And watching.  And really quite into it, one eye raised no doubt.  And so it goes, for the next thirty five minutes or so.  And then I get to the end of the episode (if you live in the same lala land that I apparently do, envision girl on girl stuff in a crazy graphic jail shower scene).  I look around for the first time in the hour and I see that every treadmill beside me and behind me and in front of me is now taken.  Ladies are passing me every thirty seconds on their way in and out of the locker room that is RIGHT NEXT TO MY TREADMILL.  And then it dawns on me…

OOOOOOOMMMMMMMGGGGGGGGG.  I am in an all girls gym, happily walking along, minding my own business aaaaaaand watching two girls do things I can’t write about on this little g-rated blog right there in public for everyone and their sister to see.

Mortified.  Just mortified.

And when I relayed the story to Honey he said “Really, Amanda, WHAT did you think a show about a women’s prison would be like?”  But that’s just it – I legit thought the show was about orange being the new color of the season.

At least now I have a plum reason to never return to the gym.
xoxo

24 thoughts on “Just Mortified

  1. I love the label on your post. I had never heard of that show either until Julianne Hough dressed up like one of the characters for Halloween.

  2. Heard about it, haven't seen it, and probably don't want to. Heard it was pretty raunchy. Just not my cup of tea. I too would have been mortified!! LOL

  3. Oh I can so relate. Years ago, I took my then 17 year old son to see "Boogie Nights" because I actually thought the movie was about disco. Little did I realize, it was about the porn industry in the 70's. My face turned every shade of red as I snatched my son from his seat. He still teases me about it.

  4. I was totally disappointed in the show. It is nothing like the book!!! The book only vaguely references the things she sees. In the show, piper is a main character, but in her book they have little to no contact!!! Try the book, it's actually pretty good and only rated about a PG ;)

  5. Something that would have completely happened to me. I've never heard of the show but I also live in lala land too. Love this post!

  6. As a resident of Lala land, I had no idea what the show was. I too thought it was somehow design related until my daughter told me. I don't think I would be interested. Are you going to continue watching? You know…sometimes shows get better…maybe?

  7. Having watched a lot of the show, I can laugh along with this-very funny! What a great reason to not have to go to the gym anymore lol!

  8. Ok – I really don't even know you other than blog land and I CAN NOT even imagine you watching this show. I gave it a one episode chance and was disgusted to ick. But this post makes me laugh! I watch Scandal in the gym It's on Netflix. Try that! lol

  9. hahah too funny!!! i had the same reaction! i decided to watch it on netflix since i heard so much hype about how funny and good it was so i decided to give it a try… then i see the lesbian/shower scenes while my parents and whole family were watching with me… AWKWARD!!!! definitely not what i thought this show would be about LOL! not sure if you watch the show Scandal, but i would suggest that! PLL is my guilty pleasure but i recently just became obsessed with Scandal- its so good and addictive! (the clothes are fab too!) glad to hear im not the only one that didnt realize what this show would be about LOL :)

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